Thursday, April 2, 2009

My Philosophy

This is me NOT doing a religion assignment.
My Philosophy:
"My problems may not be as big as yours, but they are still mine."

Yes, world, I am AWARE THAT I DO NOT HAVE CANCER. As the saying goes, You may have cancer, but my foot still hurts.
Why can't people use this philosophy more often?
But then again it's really hard to be like
It's much easier to just say "How are you?" and not give a rat's ass about what the REAL answer to the question is.
Well anyway, I'm a total hypocrite because I get so wrapped up in my own crap to care about other people. Usually, when I get this bad I feel like everything is my fault and I am terrible, selfish person. And not to be a downer, but there is probably some truth to that. Maybe I will stop getting so bad if I get my head out of my ass and look around me. Maybe I can be happy through other people. Maybe I can stop being snarky to my family and realize HEY THEY HAVE ISSUES TOO. Maybe I can stop screaming "Woe to me" everytime I see Schmadam. Maybe I'm just so messed up, People shouldn't care about me. Yups, I'll go with all of those. I think I finally realized I needed to stop screaming "Hey, look at me! I'm bipolar and INSANE! And I have problems! And I'm SAD. Pay attention to MEEEE." I think I need to accept that yes, I have depression. It's part of who I am but that doesn't mean I parade it around. We all have shit. During this whole time, all I have been saying is "GAH I'M SO SAD AHHH". I didn't think how my friends were affected. They all had their problems TOTALLY ignored by me and to top it off, I wasn't much fun to be around. Yeah I'm depressed, but their "feet still hurt". They are stressed, they have boy problems, they have family problems and just because they aren't depressed doesn't mean they don't have problems. And I think I finally need to stop letting my brain chemistry DICTATE every part of my life.

So friends, I'm ready to listen [8 months too late but it's worth a shot].

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