Do you ever marvel

at how stupid you actually are? I find myself in constant shock in relation to my lack of intelligence. I'm not smart. I like music and movies. I love to read. And my biggest wish in the world is not be here/hide away for the rest of my life with my movies and music and books. Now, some people are just meant to be intelligent. Other aren't. I mean someone has to be average. I guess that's me. Average grades, no discernable unique qualities, average looks, average everything. I'm the kid that people look at and go, "Atleast I did better than her....sucks for her....". As I look around me, people I know have found things they excel at.

The only thing I semi excel at is makeup. WHOOPDIE FRICKIN DOO. That's a good life skill right there. This is even being down on myself, like YOU tell me that 70s and low 80s aren't average. YOU tell me how it is evident that I do excel at sports, art, writing, etc. BAHAHAH what a joke.

Hell I don't even have a personality. People may say, 'Of course you do!'. Oh really? Try and describe without the words loud, talkative, center-of-attention. It's damn near impossible. Do people know that I'm actually quite shy? And that maybe the reason I talk so much and so loudly is because I don't WANT people to like me. I want them to think I'm annoying. And they do. They really do. Its easier to be alone and do what makes my head happy, and my colors happy.

You could know me forever, but you don't me at all. For example, very few know that I was put in a crazy house for a week. Nobody knows that I am really a waste of skin who can only find life in the creations of others.

In the end, I'm glad nobody likes me. Because what's the point anyway?

Bobby Jindal sucks

He just...does...
He is trespasses on so many levels of fail, it's almost incomprehensible.
OH and he's an ass.
Also, the season finale of House was fekkin AWESOME. It's actually was a pretty big shocker.

History can go die

Along with teachers.
I feel weird. In a bad way.
I think I'm going to have a manic episode.
Joy.
Well actually, yes. Manic episodes are awesome. It's what comes after that sucks balls.

Wellbutrin is not my best friend

Also, Depakote apparently can cause severe birth defect in my future children. WHOOPDIE DOO. It's not like YOUR CHILD WILL BE BORN WITHOUT A BRAIN (anencephaly, which i advise you not to google because the pictures are disturbing). But it increases the likelihood of birth defects by ten times.

Speaking of anencephaly, this is a heated topic but most women abort babies who, I don't know, are MISSING THEIR FEKKING SKULL CAP. And their frontal lobes. Yes every life matters, but if a child does not have a frontal lobe, it won't survive for more than a few hours. The longest a baby has survived in maybe three days (with the exception of Baby K). And like I said, if you did google, it's disturbing. The child will not only never have a conscious existence, but will be insensitive to pain, deaf, blind, and lack an entire portion of its brain. As in, its brain is exposed.

Granted its rare, but I know for a fact anencephaly is not the only congenital defect, fetal defect, or medical reason for abortion. I'm not saying those women have to get abortions, but they should have the choice.

Only about 1 in 250,000 babies have anencephaly and are actually born.

Wow this is really opinionated in comparison to my other posts.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRO HEADED CHILD

:)
So I was at school briefly today. Blach. I have so much work to make up, its insane. And BIG SURPRISE. KID CUDI EXPLODED. I would just like to say, I totally found him 8 months ago. KEEP THAT IN MIND TEENAGE DOPPELGANGERS.
OH SHIT HOUSE IS ON TONIGHT.
Welbutrin is my new best friend.
AND GINGER.
HOW DO YOU HAVE A LUMP NAMED LEON? WHY WAS I NOT NOTIFIED?

MARISSA FREAKING FRITZ

Are you okay?

I have returned

Mursie dear, I would like to hear from you.
And you as well Ginger. And from you wifey.

I'm leaving for a while

Hello all. I shall be going away for a few days. No need to be alarmed (not that you were, but that is why I was not in classes today and may not be for a few more days).

I'M BACK

And totally, completely unprepared to face the world. BIG SURPRISE THERE.

Okay so I have this thing.

Let's call it Pooja's Insanity. Or Sanity. Because honestly I have no idea what it is. It, let's just say, polarizes me. Sometimes I think I'm so sane, I function perfectly. But other times I'm insane. In between I hate living. It sounds bad, but it gets wickkkked awesome when I start cycling. Well wicked while it lasts. But DONE WITH THE RAMBLING.

My insanity/sanity has totally altered the way my brain works. And it scares me. Because now I don't know how my brain works. I used to know what I liked, how I think, what pleases me. I can't read a book page and remember what happened. And that scares me so, so much. I love books, they are my escape, and now I can't do it. I don't know myself. Everyday I'm changing, whether its for the better or the worse, I do not know.

None of that was coherent.

MANY MUSICS

Green Go
They are REALLY, REALLY good. (Fro headed child, you will enjoy them)
http://www.myspace.com/greengomusic
Of course, they are so obscure no videos are on youtube.
OH AND MAYBE SMITH. He sounds like Chris Martin from Coldplay.
http://www.myspace.com/maybesmith
He's also fun to look at.
Oh and PINSTRIPE. They are Scottish. And win.
I shall be going to the sister's abode in Philly. I feel super awkward because its only been two weeks since my my family viciously attacked me. Lordy.
WHAT IS LOVE IS PLAYING FROM MY LAPTOP.
I MUST DANCE TO IT
*gratuitious dance moves in conjunction with power fists*
YES. YES. YES.
Yesterday my fork got caught in the garbage disposal. I laughed and proceeded to Yes Dance.

Right now things are pink. Thulian Pink. With ;anguid lavendar. (I have a book of colors which i consult to find these fitting names.)

Today, I felt...wait for it.........PRETTY

Today, for the first time in a very, very long time, I felt PRETTY. That's not saying that I think I'm actually aesthetically pleasing. But as Cara, the fro headed child, dictated, beauty is an emotion. I felt, dare I say it, bubbly. I've started doing yoga hardcore again. I've been doing atleast an hour a day and it feels damn good.

I'm thinking of getting our friends together and doing yoga. See, the medicine chooses to work sometimes. I get rushes of energy sometimes. I feel perfect and on a high sometimes. Why? That's my brain chemistry. But yoga works everytime. It gives me a lot of real happiness.

Kashmir and Awesome Guitar Riffs

As I sit in my bedroom, pensively listening to the peacock blue Kashmir by Led Zeppelin, I realize that it is Easter Weekend. Bizarre. I wish I knew Indian holidays. I only know them from what my parents tell me and I never know the dates or times. I hate that I have a deeper connection with Christianity than with my own faith. I love being Hindu. It make me insanely happy and when I can take part in it, I feel good. Happy. Happy.Happy means a lot to me. It's green. Celadon maybe.

It's rainy today so I left my windows open. It stopped raining though :(.

Seven Nation Army.....man that is a sick guitar riff. It sounds like a bass guitar but I know its not...Remind me to figure out what the hell Jack White is playing here. I hear a whammy bar....that's about it.

Just because I'm losing, doesn't mean I'm lost

I have done absoulutely so work whatsoever.....
Let's play a fun little game, shall we?
Now imagine a beautiful little demon child. GOOD. Now imagine a pair of hopelessly bewildered middle aged persons. Now imagine them as a group totally and utterly ostracizing another person. Let's say this person is very difficult to deal with. Constantly hurt, sad, confused, annoying. The color: none. This person's life, right now, has no color. How does one go about getting color when the demon child and the odd couple walk around with giant erasers on their heads?

My Colors (Marissa still has more colors than I)

I find I am drawn to things because of colors. When I describe things, I describe colors. I love describing in general.
The coffee table:
deliciously cherry brown lacquered with some foreign sap of an exotic tree, lined with cocoa brown swirls, adorned with the occasional ring from a long forgotten cup of coffee

Now, granted that may be the WORST description ever ( I didn't say I was good.) but I enjoyed doing it. That counts, right? Everything has a color. Even voices, personalities. Marissa, to me you are a carribean blue. You know that blue that isn't really blue, but this tango between the clearest green in the whole world and the deepest cerulean in the ocean. But minus the transparency. But at the same time, I see you tinged with a peach with blush pink run through. But your mind, is definitely carribean blue, flowy and beautiful and creative. I'm not sure why I do this. (See, in my mind you also have many colors).

When I said I wanted to be a journalist, I was really drawn to the color of the occupation. Black coffee spilling over a corrugated cardboard heat protector on a crummy paper cup, shiny chrome door handles, skyscraper stillettos, typewriters clacking (yes, clacking), and ink smears in an awkward indigo violet so dark and so easily tranferred. The color of this is blue grey. It just IS. DAMMIT. It makes sense to me. In my head...Like I said though, I should just not talk.

I could be a zookeeper. That color is chartreuse, embossed with some celadon tinted leaf designs.

My doctor said it's normal that I have colors for things. I haven't really shared that I have colors for things but he said it may help if I start. I have colors for everything, so whenever I mention things, I will probably mention their colors. So I'm very content coloring things in my world. But I have a name for what I am:
chromaphile :)
That makes me feel butter yellow, with a hint of jade.
It also explain why I love makeup so much.

Break

WE HAS BREAK IN 15 MINUTES.
SHIT SON.
Well actually, it's a semi break that entails lots and lots and lots of work.
Whoohoo!

Sometimes, I should just not talk

I end up making myself sound like a total and complete idiot. So much for that...
Things sound better in my head anyway. And nobody judges me there. Well actually, I judge myself, but I can deal with my own judgments. Other people's....not so much. It's too much to carry. It's too hard to try and impress people. i like my head. Things make sense. To me, if not to my teachers or friends. And I'm pretty sure what I TRY and say comes out idiotic and poorly thought out. Well screw it. Who needs people? I have a head. With colors and pretty things and my thoughts and Yann Tiersen's piano music.

I talk a lot. I know, SHOCKER. I wish I didn't. Maybe it's because what's going on in my brain is so awesome and beautiful and I want people to see. I want people to see the colors I see and hear the sounds I do. Because they are wonderful. Because the real colors and the real sounds aren't nearly as pretty. It's sort of like, HEY IT'S COOL IN MY BRAIN. NOT TO BE COCKY...BUT NOW I SHALL TRY TO VERBALIZE. That's why I tell stories and dominate conversations. That is also why I am incredibly difficult to deal with. Also, half the time I try and vocalize a concept I have going in my head, it pops out really stupid and not deep and just BAD.

In any case, I don't let myself hear what's going on in other people's heads. I should. I should just not talk. People appreciate quiet people. It may also be because I very scared of it getting too quiet. I'm scared that one day it'll get quiet and it'll just be me and my head. And I'll be judged and hear those awful things. It's your fault. What's my fault? The point exactly. It's this inexplicable feeling of worthlessness. It's because when I'm quiet, truly quiet, I feel worthless. When I go home, before bed, I don't talk. I sit. And sometimes do nothing. And I feel worthless. So world, there it is. That's why I talk. Because my head is perfect, and that's the very reason why it tells me I'm worthless. I can't find my happiness in my reality, but in my brain. And that in itself is pathetic. That probably makes no sense. (verbalize FAIL)

Overall, I feel relieved to atleast figure out why the hell I talk so much. I thought about it while I didn't do history. Whoo.

With or Without You/I can't live, With or without you/ And you give yourself away

THERE WAS NO YOGURT IN THE CAFETERIA.
AH.
ALARMEDNESS.
Has someone ever told you something sad and you feel unbelivably awkward? It's like, I pity you, but what now....*Awkward face*
*Inches toward exit in the most sympathetic manner possible*

"Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody."

Indeed. Quite true seeing my current thoughts. I feel awkward. And I mean that is every possible sense of the word. Imagine being in a room with someone really cool. You really just want to talk to this person but they brutally rebuff you and proceed to speak to everyone but you. Whatever feeling that would be present in you at that moment is present in me right now. I have no idea why....

Noms and Brothers in law

I ate some nommy Taco Bell. Also, DAYUM girl 60,000 words! (envy) I present to you the ancient Embrace the Martian a Kid Cudi
Ignore the bizarre video


Of course, the equally ancient Day n' Nite


AND FINALLY, A VIDEO FOR "WELCOME TO HEARTBREAK"
I can't embed the video, but here is the song alone.


Kanye, what the fuck is Robocop? It's a fail....

Today we are going to visit the elder sister and brother in law. After being viciously attacked by my family at large last week, that will be awkward. Whooo. I'm just happy to go the city. I hate the suburbs. They are awkward. It's like GODDAMN YOU SLICE OF UNDECISIVE LAND, PICK YOUR LOYALTY, RURAL OR URBAN. STOP TORTURING HUMANITY WITH YOUR AWKWARD LOVE CHILD SUBURBIA.

Things like this keep me going

Mohammed Ali Jinnah, Pakistani Muslim and Mohandas Gandhi, Indian Hindu

Gratuitous Freddie Mercury and David Bowie time



Yes, that is BABY FREDDIE.


ANDDDD for shits and giggles:

Mla things and blah

Dude, the MLA is a bunch of assholes. YEAH SUCK ON THAT MRS. MAILLETT! I USED A LINKING VERB. And I am also angry at myself. I feel like I may have ignored someone I care about by ONLY talking about myself. And I did notice when she was sad. I did. I guess it's because I wasn't like HEY I NOTICE YOU. I never ask "How are you" unless I absolutely totally mean it. But anyway, I found another way to make a situation unrelated to me about me. Joy. Natalie said that maybe people don't share their problems with me because mine are bad and they feel awkward. GREAT.
I'm such a fucking drama queen. And pretty much everybody's problems are of equal or greater badness in comparison to mine. I have a house, food, I go to a great school. I CREATED my own problem. It IS my fault. I made it all up. I swear. And the result is I ignored my friends and the fact that one in particular whom I love is hurting and sad and I was too busy dealing with the problem I CREATED. Grrr I hate myself.

I was too late to listen. GAH WHY DO I KEEP THINKING OF ONLY MYSELF.

Today I snhuffled Patty as we watched an extremely poorly made PBS documentary.
All in all, the Remeron is all right. It makes me hungry. It has only been a week so I can't expect it to be working. I wish it would. I'm not really sure I can last until it kicks in.

and oh yeah
STOP TELLING ME I'M FUCKING TIRED
I'm so sick of people saying, "You look awful", "You look tired"
It's like THANKS BITCH, I THOUGHT I LOOKED FINE TODAY.

My Philosophy

This is me NOT doing a religion assignment.
My Philosophy:
"My problems may not be as big as yours, but they are still mine."

Yes, world, I am AWARE THAT I DO NOT HAVE CANCER. As the saying goes, You may have cancer, but my foot still hurts.
Why can't people use this philosophy more often?
But then again it's really hard to be like
HI ARE YOU TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY FINE IN ALL WAYS EVER?
It's much easier to just say "How are you?" and not give a rat's ass about what the REAL answer to the question is.
Well anyway, I'm a total hypocrite because I get so wrapped up in my own crap to care about other people. Usually, when I get this bad I feel like everything is my fault and I am terrible, selfish person. And not to be a downer, but there is probably some truth to that. Maybe I will stop getting so bad if I get my head out of my ass and look around me. Maybe I can be happy through other people. Maybe I can stop being snarky to my family and realize HEY THEY HAVE ISSUES TOO. Maybe I can stop screaming "Woe to me" everytime I see Schmadam. Maybe I'm just so messed up, People shouldn't care about me. Yups, I'll go with all of those. I think I finally realized I needed to stop screaming "Hey, look at me! I'm bipolar and INSANE! And I have problems! And I'm SAD. Pay attention to MEEEE." I think I need to accept that yes, I have depression. It's part of who I am but that doesn't mean I parade it around. We all have shit. During this whole time, all I have been saying is "GAH I'M SO SAD AHHH". I didn't think how my friends were affected. They all had their problems TOTALLY ignored by me and to top it off, I wasn't much fun to be around. Yeah I'm depressed, but their "feet still hurt". They are stressed, they have boy problems, they have family problems and just because they aren't depressed doesn't mean they don't have problems. And I think I finally need to stop letting my brain chemistry DICTATE every part of my life.

So friends, I'm ready to listen [8 months too late but it's worth a shot].

WOW I'M AN EMO CREEP

I need to stop that....yeah.
ANYWAY.
MY FUZE HAS MILK IN IT AND I AM ALRMED. AHHHH.
That was my alarmed voice.
And yay Slumdog is out on DVD.
Why, oh why did the Pussycat Dolls ruin Jai Ho? To quote Carly, "They're all like JAY HOOOOO *look at my boobs*
Ohhh and also. I LOVE me some Kid Cudi. He seriously is very talented. I am digging Welcome to Heartbreak by Kanye simply because of Kid Cudi. Day n Nite is fantastic but I want to BUY ALL HIS SONGS.
I also have no words. :(. This saddens me but then again, it doesn't. Grammar is boring.
WAIT....
Word: Phalarope.
Meaning: no idea

Goodbye

Today, my mom told me again that my little sister is better than me. I wish I lived somewhere else. I also wish I could just go to sleep and never wake up.

I AM NOT INSANE

YAY.
This is a dress with many colors.

And also.
I AM OBSESSED WITH KID CUDI.
Kay bye

Parents are awkward creeperhawks

Indeedy they are.
In other news, I cannot get over Schmadamgate.
I should. I need to shut up.
But this is the final call for people to sign the war document.
Ahem:
I HEREBY COMMENCE THIS RIGID COMMENCEMENT PERTAINING TO A DOUCHE NAMED SCHMADAM. HE MUST BE PUNCHED.THAT IS ALL.

Drug Lady said I should be on a "radar"

Do I act like a future addict or something?
Odd.

WHOOO I'M NOT INSANE

I feel strange. Like things maybe MIGHT get better.
But now, It's gratuitous beautiful person time.

SURPRISINGLY, It is not Christian Bale. But James Marsden sort of pwns.

Note to Marissa again

DARN MY COMPUTER NOT ALLOWING ME TO COMMENT
And yes, it is normal. There is a difference between wanting to committ suicide and thinking about it (hehe you probs knew that but this is where I will go off in a tangent with my random knowledge about human brain chemistry because I can)
If you have thought about it and are worried about what it would do to your mom or whatever, you will never do it. Ever. Suicide is a decision made completely for oneself, and thus is every bit selfish. Of course it's NORMAL to ponder death.
But if you ever:
-Lose any desire to do anything
-Start overeating or undereating and losing weight (yeah...)
-Always get sick (depression makes you immuno suppressed)
-Lose sleep (yeah...me again) or sleep excessively
-Lose ability to concentrate
-Racing thoughts
-Cry more than once a week
-Lose weight


In conjunction with your musings of suicide, I have news for you : YOU ARE OF THE POOJA ILK. But I know you are not that way.
But to spare being a drama queen, there are always those periods of time where I have SO much energy and it's sort of awesome.

(end of section where I brag/bitch about my knowledge of serotonin and dopamine)

ANYWAY
I had no idea it was possible for me to HATE life so much. Sometimes, I think it would be easier to live in my dreams. But I guess I have to find one freaking thing to cling on too and that's my friends.

As I read over that, I seem REALLY emo. I mean it's not like I have cancer or herpes (btw, Schmadam's ex girlfriend Marcella has HERPES. Like LEGITIMATELY.I KID YOU NOT)
I find that INSANELY AMUSING. In a cruel, twisted, sadistic manner.

Pooja Patel is a BITCH.

Nuff said. That was a correction of a previous statement.

BLAFARGH

The evil sinus infection attacks again. But alas, the doctor office is being a turd and won't take me until tomorrow. Whatever it takes to not have to be at play practice the whole time....

GAH SO MUCH HOMEWORK. LARGE HISTORY TEST I AM NOT PREPARED FOR. AH.
Oh, and Lincoln. WHOOHOO for gratuitous sex scenes.

Mallory Fields is a BITCH

Nuff said.

WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON HERE?

ANNNND this makes me INSANELY happy!

Obnoxious

There is a baby crying. It needs to fucking stop. He is far too old for colick, he is not hungry, nobody yelled at him, he does not need a diaper change. So he needs TO STOP.

Today, I was internally power fisting when Cheung called Schmadam out for his retarded amount of physical contact. He was filled with much anger. He needs to get over it.

I exercise like a beeeeech.

If you are confused by the title, I am, indeed, saying I exercise like a beech tree.
Today Patty and I did many lunges while watching a woman not wear pants. Then we used our arms and did twists. I was a wildebeest. Schadam also attempted to rape me again. SURPRISE. OH and I want to start a petition saying "UNDERWEAR IS NOT PANTS. NEITHER IS SPANDEX" I think plastic surgery ridden women often forget that. I am very good at exercise. That is all.

Today, I watched Michael Bagley get kicked in the face

It was awesome. I then watched Schmadam gets punched in the gut.
All in all, fantastic day.

I love words, words, words words. Here they go down. Down into my belly.

I enjoy words. I also hate other words.

Indian word: elaichi
Elaichi is the perfect word for cardamom. It looks, tastes, and feels like something called elaichi. It's perfect.

Indian Word: Pyar, Ishk, Mohabhatt
All those words mean love. Isn't that awesome? W have three fekkin words that mean love and each one is different. Pyar is just love, love for anyone ever. Ishk is almost infatuation. Mohabhatt is that crazy, passionate, I'll die for you love.

Indian Word: Kitaab
Kitaab means book. Its perfect for book. K is an interesting consonant. It's...undecisive. You don't always remember "k" words. And words rarely end in "B". The "t" is almost like "th". It just sounds right.

English word: Thyme
Its an herb, obvi. But its so pretty and it looks pretty. And the herb itself is pretty.

English word: Effervescent
BUBBBBBBBLES. I love words that I can connect immediately to an event or emotion. Bubbly, fizzy, bright, perfect.

English word: Infinitesimal
Okay. JUST LOOK AT IT. IT'S PRETTY.

Arabic phrase: ana b'hebbak (man), ana b'hebbek (woman)
This means I love you. Arabic is so PRETTY. GOD. I WISH I COULD SPEAK IT DAMMIT

More pretty Arabic words/phrases:
Kaif - how
Fel al massa - tonight
Ramadi (my favorite ever) - gray
Inshalla- hopefully (isn't it the prettiest sound for the best meaning)
Sabah El-Khair, Masaa El-Khair- Good morning, good evening

Kids

So I'm listening to MGMT as I do when I refuse to do homework and I came across "Kids".
It's pretty old, but I loves it. If you haven't heard it:


It's a win. But apparently, MGMT is suing Nicolas Sarkozy, the French President. INDIE TECHNO BAND FTWWW. Hahah apparently he forgot to tell the band when he decided to use their song ALL OVER FRANCE. Remember when Sarah Palin got prank called and ACTUALLY thought it was Nicolas Sarkozy? Fail Sarah Palin. Fail.

Thus Nicolas Sarkozy has been put on my list of people that randomly show up in my life. Another is Kevin Bacon....He's everywhere...it's weird.

MGMT is the shit though... GO LISTEN TO ELECTRIC FEEL. NOW.

I quote the Irish Child

That could be any one of my friends, but this quote inspires me:
"Sometimes Shmadam makes me feel full of anger bubbles."
Me too. Wise words, pale child. Wise Words.

In other mundane suburban news, I watched American Pie. Oh the wonderful feeling that comes from trashy, coming of age, sex filled, alcohol filled, poorly acted movies.

I have little to talk about. My head hurts. I enjoy coconut sauce and Thai food.

BAHAHAHA SCHMADAM SCHMONNER

BAHAH HE'S SO AWKWARD.
Sadly,he was mean to the people I love. I am not cool with that.
Also, I here place a picture of a beautiful person. Because that is the opposite of what Schmadam Schmonner is.

Happy Holi!

It's Holi! (The Festival of Colors, Marissa you shall enjoy this)
I can't celebrate it...ANGER.
Usually, Holi is celebrated by dressing in all white and proceeding to throw colored powder at each other. And there is a bonfire. And food. It's awesome....
LOOK HOW CUTE THIS CHILD IS. I found him on google in a non weird way.
ELEPHANTS.

We love parties.

SO. MANY. COLORS.

Are you a fishmonger?

I'm a creep

I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? Look if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted-One moment. Would you capture it, or just let it slip? Because I made it through the wilderness, somehow I made it through.

That paragraph made no sense at all. I am done quoting songs.

Well I was thinking and I have this bizzare desire to move somewhere new. Like it would be crazy awesome to move to a sick city, like Philadelphia and just live there. Meet entirely new people, work at some awesome little vintage book shop and just reinvent myself. That sounds really weird and I would miss my friends.

Meh Whatevs. Any comments Mursie?

Note to Marissa

Hello there.
For some reason, your new layout on your blog does not allow for me to post comments.
But, sorry about that...
Hehe I fail at the whole "UNDERSTANDING WHAT PEOPLE MEAN" thing....

GYM MEET.

HOLY SHIT PEOPLE.
IT'S GYM MEET DAY.
AH.

People=designed to be frustrating

There are about 10 people I know that do not infuriate me. Make that nine actually...

Romeo and Juliet = worst play to ever pick ever

Schmadam Schmonner= Fail McFailpants.

(and criminally unattractive)

Schmal Schmarks (Does that work???)= Angering McIinfuriatepants

Me= Fail.

Christian Bale= Win.

DEUS EX MACHINA.

That was highly relevant. I ate a grapfruit today. I also went on a escapade. To the marmalade forest. Where I sat in the cave and ate bubble gum pie. Yum. I have decided I really like Amy Tan as an author. Tetrafuckingwin.

Lincoln by Gore Vidal : AAKJSFHJDHFJAFHJASDHGLKLSAGKA

Kayyyyyyyyy. Bye.

So...I probably sound like an emo creep

So yeah, as I reread that last post, I realized I sound like a crazy emo child. Take away the bitterness from the last post and you will get the gist of what I am saying.

Fashion week goes onward. That's a misnomer...it's pretty much fashion month...
Freida Pinto showed up in Milan at the Dolce and Gabbanna show. I'm excited for the new Woody Allen movie, which apparently, she's in.

She modeled on the catwalk...she WOULD be a former model...


Photo: Stefano Rellandini/REUTERS

I like the design she is modeling, surprisingly. I have been dissapointed with many of the spring/summer fashions. Here is another fabulous Dolce and Gabbana creation. The mix of pattern is fantastic and the black and white is offset with maroony purple. The only problem is, I'm not a fan of the childish polka dots. I love the high waist and the tights, but I could go for a pop of color in the tights. That's not really Dolce and Gabbanna style though...



Photo: Imaxtree

Here, however, is my FAVORITE Dolce and Gabbana look. It's the perfect mix of edge and feminine qualities. We have the delicate, feminine black top (The sleeves are a bit extreme for mainstream fashion, but the general idea is great). This feminine top if offset by the edgy art inspired print skirt. The look is topped off with a bold chunky rock-bead white spackled necklace. Now obviously you can see these things, but the different elements are brilliant. I would subsititute the white with a fresh green or a deep amethyst and tie the look together with a pair of colored suede pumps. The shoes on here however, do just as well to accentuate the marriage of edge and femininity. The bag is alright, I could go for a bag with kick ass hardware, heavy chains. That trend has been long overused, but I still love it. Even better would be a jewel toned satin clutch, which will never go out of style.



Photo: Imaxtree

I love that black and white is creeping back in, as the line is almost solely black and white.

Fashion may seem pointless and a waste of money, but to me its the art we live our lives in. Clothes are an outer form of expression and this is art! Enough ranting....I am tied down with mountains of schoolwork that I am just choosing to ignore....

Cynicism and Kanye West

I am guilty of the crime of totally and utterly hating love. Well that was an exaggeration. I hate infatuation/teeange relationships. Now, honestly, you may ask, "How can you HATE love?". It's very possible. For one, it picks to bless only certain people with it's presence and its various forms. It likes to ignore others. No, I am not coming out of a breakup, but I find relationships exceedingly irritating and nauseating. I'm sick of trying to impress the opposite sex. It's worthless and wastes my time. It's like lovebug is skipping over my head when it decides to bite teenagers.

Boyfriends are overrated. Do girls REALLY think that relationship will last? I think love when you find someone who REALLY cares for you is great. I will remain a cynic until one day, God decides to be nice and drop a poor little soul on earth who actually gives a crap about me. I am content with my friends. I am getting tired of the lovey dovey disgusting manufactured infatuation though.

Now, I remain firm when I say I do not at ALL like 808's and Heartbreak by Kanye West. It's all about how he broke up with his girlfriend. GREAT Kanye! BUST OUT THE AUTOTUNE AND WHINE ABOUT YOUR SUPERFICIAL RELATIONSHIP! That will make everything better...But the songs are OKAY, when he starts rapping. Remember that Kanye? Rapping?
I've had Amazing stuck in my head for a while...It's alright, as best. Heartless is te best track, In my humble opinion. Please Kanye, go back to your College Dropout days...Well even Graduation days! Graduation was great!

And for shits and giggles, old school Kanye. This was a year ago...how in the hell did he change SO much?

Being sick sucks ass

So I have the flu. I'm ALWAYS sick...I am not exaggerating.
I spent my Tuesday night shivering, crying, and sweating out a fever on my couch. I have no idea why I cry when I am sick...
FAIL.
I also hate school with a deep, burning passion.
I am remarkably at a loss for words, internet world....

Love

I cannot get over how beautiful this Valentino gown is. Its from the Spring 2009 Collection and its so wonderfully fairytale esque. I think it is impossible to feel ugly in that gown. This model doesn't look at atrociously thin as others. Hey, Gisele Bundchen...didn't you bring back NORMAL models? Why is heroin chic and waif thin coming back into fashion...EW. Just ignore the starved, emaciated model and focus on that beautiful gown. I mean, do designers ENJOY putting beautiful clothing on women starved until they become poles with disproportional, albeit beautiful, heads?

In other news, Prada unveiled some shiteous creations...


That right there is a prime example....WTF IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE?







But to save your brain for exploding from sheer HIDEOUSNESS and waste of money in the time of recession...


Versace :) Once again, ignore rail thin model...

Photos Imaxtree

So yeah, those Oscar things

WELL THEN. Hugh Jackman is just one massive sexmuffin. Have you SEEN the man?
That opening number was AMAZING. Hehehe. He was surprisingly funny and better than Ellen. I love Ellen but that was one of the least funny Oscar shows ever.

Dev Patel and Freida Pinto of COURSE looking fanfreakingtastic. I love Freida's dress and obviously, I love Dev Patel. Since we are getting married and all.


Photos: Robyn Beck/AFP/Getty Images, Steve Granitz/WireImage

And then my favorite dress of the night was Anne Hathaway's Marion Cotillardesque shimmering Armani Prive.

Photos: Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images

But my favorite part BESIDES Heath Ledger winning, Kate Winslet, and Hugh Jackman was Dustin Lance Black. His speech was beyond inspirational and I'm so glad he won.This clip includes the HYSTERICAL Tina Fey/Steve Martin shtick. BTW, Tina Fey looked STUNNING.


AND for shits and giggles, I give you the opening number. Which was a win. Gosh, I love Anne Hathaway.


And the funniest montage of all (dude how many of them were there, like 8 million)
James Franco and Seth Rogen: Comedy Montage
All I can say is BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. The song about Mama Mia! is GENIUS.

Sick

I am beginning to think that I am immuno supressed seeing how I always manage to become sick and spike fevers. I decided today that I absolutely hate the suburban mentality. This is why I want to travel or move to a city because I can't STAND small minds and narrow thoughts. But on the plus side, there are many full size Targets in suburbia. Target=my happy place. Next to Sephora, MAC, Barnes and Noble, and Philadelphia.

Now, the second season of Flight of the Conchords is going swimmingly. The first episode kind of sucked, but it has improved. This clip is from the episode from a couple weeks ago.


Bret McKenzie MARRY ME.

Wazzzzup

Homework= stupid.
So I opt to just NOT do it.
The Oscars are tomorrow. In case America's obsession with the superficial didn't alert you. Slumdog Millionaire FTW.
I am massive fan of Freida Pinto, whom I think is absolutely GORGEOUS.
It is my dream to meet her ahaha OH AND MARRY DEV PATEL. Since I am Patel, and my parents would be cool with it.
It is almost unfair to be this gorgeous.

Photo: Jason Merritt/Kevin Winer/Kevork Djansezian/Getty
AND MY FUTURE HUSBAND:


LOOK HOW ADORABLE.

The Menfolk are Stupid

They are. The End.
:)
Now as you (I feel weird saying "you" but I do it anyway) all know its SPRING FASHION TIME. Manish Arora, my favorite Indian designer, debuted his spring line a few months ago, but of course this was in India and I only JUST caught wind.
I love, love LOVE it! Here's a glance:


I don't understand how people say this ISN'T an art. BTW, My little profile pic is of one his designs from a few seasons ago. :)

Music :)

I am currently addicted to this blog shindig.
And A-Ha by Santogold. now, I have been a massive fan of M.I.A. for three years but I love me some Santogold as well. A-Ha is a few months old and has already been pretty popular in the UK. But Santogold is just the shit. Like Franz Ferdinand, so I shall link them too, even though you've all heard them :).



The KILLER "No You Girls Never Know" :)


And a random one. With a Heavy Heart by Does it Offend you, Yeah?



Santogold!

Hmm. REALLY?

For the -2 people who read this blog:

So yes, there are 303,000 websites referencing fear of the Chinese.

Also. Has anybody googled Gingerism? Dude apparently it actually EXISTS and its racism against the gingas. Its a huge problem in England where like some family had to keep moving and some kid got killed.

This puzzles me greatly seeing as one of their PRINCES is a ginger. Tsk tsk, England. Tsk Tsk.

Today was craptastic, as I find most are. The drama teacher went fekking INSANE. It was great, except not. Mostly Creepy.

Like Snuggies.

I now shall include a gratuitious picture of Christian Bale. Life is better with CBale. And Batman. Which by the way, I love.

HELLO INTERNET

At the risk of becoming a stereotypical whiny, blogging female, I created a blog.
Why?
To expose you to random shit in my life.
And to share with you things that delight me. Like Indian people and grapefruit.